[Magdalen] My announcement (was Quick prayer request)

[Molly Wolf]

Oddly, I saw this coming.  Blessings on your transition, and welcome as a sister.

Molly

The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way. -- Mark Twain

> On Oct 16, 2014, at 4:38 PM, Marion Thompson <marionwhitevale at gmail.com> wrote:
> 
> I salute your courage, Kristen, and feel both honoured and humbled that you have shared yourself and your journey with us.  I pray that this pub may always be a safe and trustworthy home for you, and especially I pray for you and for Heather.  God go with you.
> 
> Marion, a pilgrim     ... today my sail I lift ....
> 
>> On 10/16/2014 12:59 PM, Scott Rollins wrote:
>> ​I hope you'll forgive me for not writing a separate post, but I hope to
>> when life calms down a bit.
>> 
>> I sent the message below to the choir on Tuesday, so that they would know
>> of it before our rehearsal last night. And, as had been arranged, when I
>> had sent the message to the choir, the rector forwarded it on to the
>> members of the vestry and the rest of the staff.
>> 
>> The message (and then I'll add a bit more):
>> 
>> ----- Begin included message -----
>> 
>> Friends,
>> 
>> A few days ago, I gave Father Derek my resignation. My final Sunday will be
>> in just over a month.
>> 
>> Part of the reason is burnout. My reaction to the parts of the job that I
>> have found difficult has grown to consume more and more of my attention and
>> my energy as time has gone on. Were this the only reason, I would have
>> attempted to find adjustments that would permit me to continue.
>> 
>> However, over the past few years, I have also been coming to an
>> understanding of who I am which does not match how I have been presenting
>> myself to you. And I have reached the point where I can't continue hiding
>> who I am; that is, where I can't continue hiding that I am a transgender
>> woman.
>> 
>> A word on terminology: a transgender woman is somebody who despite the
>> anatomy they were born with identifies as a woman. It isn't about
>> impersonation or performance, it is about who I am.
>> 
>> I recognize that there are those who will be uncomfortable with this and
>> others who will object based upon their beliefs. So while I have come to
>> the point where I need to be more open about who I am, I also believe that
>> continuing in a staff position during this transition would lead to
>> controversy and division within the parish, and be a distraction from (and
>> detriment to) the real mission of St. John's, as well as adding to how
>> difficult it would be for me to handle my responsibilities as your choir
>> director.
>> 
>> I want to thank you all for everything you all do for this parish and for
>> all you have done over the last four and a half years to welcome me and to
>> help lead music here at St. John's. I ask for your prayers, and you will
>> continue to be in my prayers.
>> 
>> ----- End included message -----
>> 
>> The one thing that I left out was my name. I am using the name Kristin. I
>> have been using that name in various places online for a while now, but I
>> wanted to stay as Scott at work until my finish date (which is Nov 16), in
>> an attempt to not cause too much of an issue while I'm still in a
>> leadership position.
>> 
>> I have been surprised at how positive the responses have been. I received
>> replies Tuesday from most of the choir, and I received a couple of other
>> messages from people in or connected to the vestry. And most of them were
>> fully supportive. (Though, of course, there were one or two that were sorry
>> I was leaving but mostly ignoring the reason behind it. I am sure the
>> conversations between parishioners are far more "interesting" than any
>> conversation that I will be part of.)
>> 
>> My biggest fear had been the word getting to the parish and now that the
>> situation is public knowledge, I'm feeling freer to let other people who
>> knew me as Scott know. Before this week, the people who knew were my wife,
>> my stepdaughter, my mother, my former therapist, our current one, my
>> rector, a former parishioner who moved out of state, and members of my
>> wife's now-former order, and then the online people who have only known me
>> as Kristin. Now, I'm both excited and scared about coming out to other
>> people and trying to stagger it enough that I don't drown under the
>> responses, but quickly enough that people who need to hear quickly do.
>> 
>> So, that's the situation here. Thank you for all your prayers around the
>> announcement, and I'd appreciate them as I move forward.
>> 
>> Kristin
>> .
>