[Magdalen] This saying No is tough

[Susan Hagen]

It is tough but it gets much easier with practice.  The important
thing is to never, ever, get drawn into explanations.  No is no.
Susan

On Mon, Sep 22, 2014 at 1:20 PM, Scott Knitter <scottknitter at gmail.com> wrote:
> I have trouble saying No, to say the least. Recently I did say no to
> taking on a continuing role as an editor/writer/interviewer/idea
> person for the revived parish newsletter. Felt borderline good/awful
> but I did it. What I'd change: not follow up the no-saying with "Sorry
> I flaked out" or some such.
>
> Now we've got a reception coming up to honor our choirmaster for 30
> years as choirmaster. He's great, so I jumped on the request from a
> vestry member to post on the website and Facebook page about the
> celebration right away. And I appreciated the vestry member's writing
> an article and giving me good photos, so all I had to do was post.
>
> She asked later if I would say a few words at the reception, and I
> begged off, saying we have a house guest that weekend (we do, and I'm
> as usual filled with anxiety about that) and didn't know if I'd be
> allowed to be at the reception so couldn't be counted on to say a few
> words (about five minutes, which sounds like more than a few words).
> She still left it that maybe I could have something ready in case I am
> there and am called on. Always the door is kept open to my maybe
> saying yes after all. Should have closed that door.
>
> Now the choirmaster's wife is phoning me on both my phones and leaving
> messages about talking further about the celebration and what's on the
> website...She is obviously trying to give me a project. When the
> second phone rang, I threw it down the hallway.
>
> My attitude at the moment is that if she can't email me what she wants
> to say, I can't help her. But I'll try to keep the anger out of it and
> just let the message be No, I can't take on anything right now.
>
> --
> Scott R. Knitter
> Edgewater, Chicago, Illinois USA



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