[Magdalen] Sunday Groaner

[Michael Bishop]

Every Sunday in our weekly church notice sheet I include a secion called 
"Sunday Groaner". This proves perhaps the most popular item and an 
incentive to people to take it home and read the whole lot.
This week's Groaners might appeal to those on this list:

Sunday Groaner
Choice
Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president, and 
50 
for Miss America?

A WC worth visiting
Years ago a young couple were house-hunting in rural Somerset, and so 
visited an elderly clergyman who had a cottage for sale. Later they 
could not remember seeing a bathroom in the property, and so wrote 
asking where the WC might be.
The minister was not familiar with the term, and decided they must be 
asking for the nearest Wesleyan Church. And so he wrote them this reply:
‘Dear … I regret to inform you that the nearest WC is fifty miles away, 
which is most unfortunate if you are in the habit of going regularly. 
This one is situated in a beautiful valley, and many local people make a 
day of it, setting off in early morning and taking picnics with them. 
Some travel by car, others by bus, and some (on foot) arrive just in 
time. A bell rings 20 minutes before the WC opens, and there is plenty 
of standing room if you are late.
Inside, there are 40 plush seats, and beautiful carvings on the walls. 
The children sing as they process in, and there is even an organ 
accompaniment. I hope this will encourage you to visit it, and enjoy 
what it offers. I myself have not been for five months, and you can 
imagine this pains me very much. Yours faithfully…

Wear out
Three little boys were bragging about how tough they were. 
I'm so 
tough," said the first boy, "that I can wear out a pair of shoes in a 
week." 
Well," said the second little boy, "I'm so tough, I can wear out 
a pair of jeans in a day." 

"That's nothing," said the third boy. "When my parents take me to see my 
grandma and grandpa, I can wear them out in just one hour."

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God bless

Michael Bishop
rev at michaelbishop.name

Rector of Boylestone, Church Broughton, Dalbury, Longford, Long Lane, Sutton-on-the-Hill & Trusley

Diocese of Derby, England