[Magdalen] P.S. Re: Update

[Molly Wolf]

I'm feeling very bitter about church, which seems to me to wring its hands and make gooey noises about Love while being, in fact, somewhat less useful than tits on a male ostrich.  But that may be the depression talking.

Molly

The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way. -- Mark Twain

> On Feb 17, 2017, at 4:33 PM, Molly Wolf <lupa at kos.net> wrote:
> 
> Appointment with oncologist this morning -- actually, this afternoon because she was TWO AND A HALF FREAKIN' HOURS LATE, and not nearly apologetic enough.  "These things happen" does not cut nearly enough mustard. I told her that it was worse when I had to wait three hours just to see the oncology cardiologist's med student and another half hour to see the doctor herself. That time, I had neither reading material nor iPad.  Doctors. <snarl>
> 
> The good news is that my body is holding up well under the barrage of chemo drugs, although fatigue is a steadily increasing issue.  Apparently I am a Good Patient.  Red and white blood cells and platelets are nobly hanging in there.  We're going to reduce the dosage by 10% because after the last round, I felt as though Thor had hammered me into the ground.
> 
> The other good news is that Charity, my oncologist nurse, will no longer be on my case.  She earned the nickname Ratchett.  I figured the oncologist owed me that much.
> 
> That's the good news.  The not-so-good news is that my ancient, powerful foe Depression is roused and giving battle.  A new drug I'm on has helped, but it's still far too easy to slip back into the darkness.  Depression also tends to make me self-isolate while being hurt by isolation, which is a nasty piece of circular self-injury.  And God and church get all mixed up in the muddle. (Is church a place to look for Love?  My mother always said it wasn't.)
> 
> Do prayers help?  Dunno. Will dutifully ask, just in case.
> 
> The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way. -- Mark Twain