[Magdalen] My announcement (was Quick prayer request)

[Jon Egger]

Kristin,

I am very honored to know you and that you're accepting the name that God
originaly called you.  I'm sure you are greatly relieved by letting people
know, and also relieved that your stress level will lessen now that you
have resigned your position.  Yes, some people will be upset, but for me
(and I am sure others) your sexuality and gender 'tis but a blip of
joy...please, my sister in Christ, remember that we are made in God's
("our") image.  Please let us know of any plans for gender reassignment
surgery.  As I understand it, it is much easier for male to female surgery
than female to male.

Gosdspeed on this journey, and prayers always.

+++
Grace & peace,
jon


On Thu, Oct 16, 2014 at 12:43 PM, Roger Stokes <
roger.stokes65 at btinternet.com> wrote:

> Kristin,
>
> When you first asked for our prayers over your situation I thought it was
> about more than resigning your present position and that who you are was at
> the root of it.  My prayers that your coming out proceeds smoothly.
>
> On a related issue it was our Beer Festival last week and I remember
> serving somebody a couple of years ago who was clearly a man in the early
> stages of transition to woman, dressed and presenting as female but with
> clealry male features and looks.  By last year there was a clear change in
> how she looked, sufficient to need a check, which was provided by the
> Adam's Apple.  Last week she was clearly at ease in her persona and the
> treatment has had a very marked effect.  Her hair would have been the envy
> of many a natural-born woman.
>
> This is not an easy step to have taken and it shows great courage.
>
> Roger
>
> On 16/10/2014 17:59, Scott Rollins wrote:
>
>> ​I hope you'll forgive me for not writing a separate post, but I hope to
>> when life calms down a bit.
>>
>> I sent the message below to the choir on Tuesday, so that they would know
>> of it before our rehearsal last night. And, as had been arranged, when I
>> had sent the message to the choir, the rector forwarded it on to the
>> members of the vestry and the rest of the staff.
>>
>> The message (and then I'll add a bit more):
>>
>> ----- Begin included message -----
>>
>> Friends,
>>
>> A few days ago, I gave Father Derek my resignation. My final Sunday will
>> be
>> in just over a month.
>>
>> Part of the reason is burnout. My reaction to the parts of the job that I
>> have found difficult has grown to consume more and more of my attention
>> and
>> my energy as time has gone on. Were this the only reason, I would have
>> attempted to find adjustments that would permit me to continue.
>>
>> However, over the past few years, I have also been coming to an
>> understanding of who I am which does not match how I have been presenting
>> myself to you. And I have reached the point where I can't continue hiding
>> who I am; that is, where I can't continue hiding that I am a transgender
>> woman.
>>
>> A word on terminology: a transgender woman is somebody who despite the
>> anatomy they were born with identifies as a woman. It isn't about
>> impersonation or performance, it is about who I am.
>>
>> I recognize that there are those who will be uncomfortable with this and
>> others who will object based upon their beliefs. So while I have come to
>> the point where I need to be more open about who I am, I also believe that
>> continuing in a staff position during this transition would lead to
>> controversy and division within the parish, and be a distraction from (and
>> detriment to) the real mission of St. John's, as well as adding to how
>> difficult it would be for me to handle my responsibilities as your choir
>> director.
>>
>> I want to thank you all for everything you all do for this parish and for
>> all you have done over the last four and a half years to welcome me and to
>> help lead music here at St. John's. I ask for your prayers, and you will
>> continue to be in my prayers.
>>
>> ----- End included message -----
>>
>> The one thing that I left out was my name. I am using the name Kristin. I
>> have been using that name in various places online for a while now, but I
>> wanted to stay as Scott at work until my finish date (which is Nov 16), in
>> an attempt to not cause too much of an issue while I'm still in a
>> leadership position.
>>
>> I have been surprised at how positive the responses have been. I received
>> replies Tuesday from most of the choir, and I received a couple of other
>> messages from people in or connected to the vestry. And most of them were
>> fully supportive. (Though, of course, there were one or two that were
>> sorry
>> I was leaving but mostly ignoring the reason behind it. I am sure the
>> conversations between parishioners are far more "interesting" than any
>> conversation that I will be part of.)
>>
>> My biggest fear had been the word getting to the parish and now that the
>> situation is public knowledge, I'm feeling freer to let other people who
>> knew me as Scott know. Before this week, the people who knew were my wife,
>> my stepdaughter, my mother, my former therapist, our current one, my
>> rector, a former parishioner who moved out of state, and members of my
>> wife's now-former order, and then the online people who have only known me
>> as Kristin. Now, I'm both excited and scared about coming out to other
>> people and trying to stagger it enough that I don't drown under the
>> responses, but quickly enough that people who need to hear quickly do.
>>
>> So, that's the situation here. Thank you for all your prayers around the
>> announcement, and I'd appreciate them as I move forward.
>>
>> Kristin
>>
>>
>>
>