[Magdalen] This saying No is tough

[Molly Wolf]

What Jay said.

Molly

The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way. -- Mark Twain

> On Sep 23, 2014, at 12:24 PM, Jay Weigel <jay.weigel at gmail.com> wrote:
> 
> ISTM that Jim G's assessment is accurate, and that love for ritual and
> style should not trump desire for a caring community, in the sum of things.
> Scott must decide what is most important to him, and I trust that, with the
> help of his therapist, he will do that.
> 
>> On Tue, Sep 23, 2014 at 8:50 AM, Jim Guthrie <jguthrie at pipeline.com> wrote:
>> 
>> From: Susan Hagen
>> 
>> It is tough but it gets much easier with practice.  The important
>>> thing is to never, ever, get drawn into explanations.  No is no.
>> 
>> In Scott's situation, it may even be that the explanation will have no
>> effect at all, let alone saying, "No" or even "Not right now.."
>> 
>> From what Scott has related, he's been willing and able to do what he's
>> been asked, but right now he's dealing with personal issues that need time
>> and clear-thinking and relief from obligations.
>> 
>> In a "normal" parish where there's great concern and care for each other,
>> the situation would be understood, and other parish members would pitch in,
>> with no explanation needed. But Scott's situation is challenging because it
>> appears that neither fellow parishioners nor the Rector give much of a hoot
>> about his situation.
>> 
>> This is not about burnout, or offering ones gifts as one is able. It's
>> about Christian Community, or lack of it, I think.
>> 
>> Cheers,
>> Jim Guthrie
>>