[Magdalen] 2014

Fri Jan 2 08:33:32 UTC 2015

Your comment about aides caused me to remember a wonderful moment when I
was out with my mother.  She loved to visit Perkins, and I loved taking
her, but it was a bit of a chore to get her in and out of the car and into
and out of her wheelchair.

Those of you more familiar with this than I probably chuckle at my
inability to do this relatively simple transfer, but I fretted a lot about
dropping my mother.  In any case, as we were leaving, the manager, a very
nice lady, strolled out to our rental car and, explaining that she used to
do this all the time, made the transfer of Mom into the car, chatting her
up like they were sisters all the while. I was grateful, and had confidence
that I could do better.

Another thing that I thought was especially wonderful is the fact that
Marcy knows that Matthew has had real successes.  We all want to know as we
end our life times that someone is carrying on.  My niece told us that as
Mom lay unresponsive in the last days of her life, my niece had them put
the phone next to Mom so Anna could talk to her, even if Mom could not
respond.  Anna talked about her excitement as she approached the due date
for her second child, and she confided in Mom what they were going to name
the Baby. I think there has been a lot of remarks on how hearing continues
when all other senses have shut down.

James W. Oppenheimer-Crawford
*“If you have a chance to accomplish something that will make things better
for people coming behind you, and you don’t do it, you're wasting your time
on this Earth.”  -- *Roberto Clemente

On Thu, Jan 1, 2015 at 11:36 AM, James Handsfield <jhandsfield at icloud.com>
wrote:

> I just realized I left out Roger’s visit.  That was definitely a highlight.
>
> “The worst form of corruption is acceptance of corruption.”  Herblock
>
> Jim Handsfield
> jhandsfield at att.net
>
>
>
>
> > On Dec 31, 2014, at 11:14 PM, James Handsfield <jhandsfield at icloud.com>
> wrote:
> >
> > As we bid farewell to 2014, I have a few observations of the year.
> >
> > I’m grateful that Marcy is still with me.  Dealing with her illness has
> been trying, but as I look back there have been some wonderful moments as
> well.
> >
> > 1. We had a wonderful trip to Key West in March.  We took two days to
> drive down and back, stopping in Orlando both times.  Key West is a
> community that is delightful - street performers in Mallory Square,
> President Truman’s Little White House, Jimmy Buffett’s Margaritaville.
> Interesting restaurants.  One of the interesting things is it seems that
> most hospitality establishments seem to have become an industry home for
> Russian immigrants.  They did a wonderful job.
> >
> > 2. We started having home care aids come in.  In a way, that’s something
> neither Marcy nor I wants, but they are here to help me (and in many ways
> keep me sane).  We’ve been through several, but it looks like we’ve finally
> found some that like us and we like them, so we hope that will make for a
> better 2015.
> >
> > 3. In September I took a respite trip to Hawaii as a guest of my
> brother, Hunter Handsfield and sister-in-law Patricia McInturff.  It was a
> good trip for me (but not really long enough).  I was able to gain some
> perspective and make some decisions. That part worked well.  OTOH, it was
> not a good time for Marcy and our first home care aid.  Marcy’s sister
> turned out to not have the self confidence to do what I know she could have
> done, so Marcy ended up most nights starting sleep in bed, but when she had
> to get up to use the bathroom, she’d spend the rest of the night in her
> lift chair.  Granted her lift chair is very comfortable (I have an
> identical one and have slept in it several times), but it was disappointing.
> >
> > 4. We started out the year thinking Marcy might not survive the year
> because of her respiratory capacity.  It turned out to not be the case,
> TBTG.  That doesn’t mean there haven’t been issues.  Over all, Marcy is
> weaker almost day by day, and needs assistance with most of her daily
> routine.  She takes all of her medications and most of her hydration
> through a G-tube.  But a couple months ago, she agreed to see a
> psychiatrist who diagnosed her with depression disorder and offered her a
> prescription for Prozac.  A few days later, Marcy accepted it, and the
> difference has been night and day.  Where before she was getting upset over
> little things, now she still gets upset but only when it’s appropriate.
> Her personality is more like she was when I fell in love with her -
> playful, caring, and a little more self sacrificing (going back to bed so I
> can have some alone time at breakfast, for example).
> >
> > 5. A couple weeks ago, we had an inaugural appointment/meeting with the
> Palliative Care team at Kaiser Permanente Georgia.  It was a good session
> with a physician, an RN, an LCSW, and a chaplain.  A pharmacist is also a
> member of the team, but that person wasn’t present.  This is also the team
> that will oversee hospice care when the time comes.
> >
> > 6. Finally (for this email), is Matthew.  He graduated Cum Laude from
> Tulane University in May with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Political
> Science and a minor in History.  He immediately went to work (actually
> being paid!) for the Louisiana Democratic Party as the volunteer
> coordinator for Sen. Mary Landrieu’s reelection campaign.  She was not
> expected to carry Jefferson Parish where Matthew was assigned, but ended up
> gaining the plurality there, largely thanks to Matthew, and recognized by
> the state Democratic Party.  When Sen. Landrieu lost her bid for
> reelection, he was released.  He then successfully landed a short term job
> (with a significant pay increase) with Brass Tactics, a progressive
> political consulting company in DC.  He’s assisting people who are
> interested to sign up for ACA coverage during the open season in the Kansas
> City metro area (both MO and KS).
> >
> > It’s been an interesting year.  Let’s see what 2015 brings.  We’re
> celebrating Marcy’s 60th birthday with a dinner party at the Capital Grille
> in Dunwoody on her birthday.  There’s a good chance this birthday will be
> her last, so we’re doing it up big for both reasons.
> >
> > Happy New Year, everyone.
> >
> > “Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the
> world.” — Nelson Mandela
> >
> > Jim Handsfield
> > jhandsfield at att.net
> >
> >
> >
> >
>
>