[Magdalen] Kaeton's commentary

[Marion Thompson]

On a different list at a different time in a different circumstance, I 
ran into the hard wall of "OMG You are such an idiot!  What WERE you 
THINKING?"  As if the person isn't thinking that for him/herself!
I am not prepared to jump on the wagon of that sort of response, which 
only heaps coals on the head of one who is already gravely wounded at a 
profound level.

Marion, a pilgrim    ... today my sail I lift ....
On 1/3/2015 9:38 PM, James Oppenheimer-Crawford wrote:
> I was just observing the general flow of conversation and the surfacing of
> a lot of emotions from various points of view, and it occurred to me that
> we can say all kinds of stuff when the person involved is somewhat distant.
> After all, whatever we might say, the person who is the object of the
> discussion isn't here, so what we say has no impact on her. If the
> individual were a sometime contributor to the conversation here, I suspect
> that the choice of words would be a bit different.  there is a bit of
> difference between, "OMG! WHAT an idiot!  What WAS she THINKING?"  and
> "OMG! You are such an idiot! What WERE you THINKING!"
> I know I interact entirely differently when the person is someone I know
> personally. And I know that shouldn't be so.
> Then I thought to myself, "I wonder if this individual is a lurker on this
> list."
> And for those who are thinking of saying you would have said exactly the
> same , etc., etc. -- please don't.
>
> James W. Oppenheimer-Crawford
> *“If you have a chance to accomplish something that will make things better
> for people coming behind you, and you don’t do it, you're wasting your time
> on this Earth.”  -- *Roberto Clemente
>
> On Sat, Jan 3, 2015 at 8:30 PM, Ginga Wilder <gingawilder at gmail.com> wrote:
>
>> Civil law and ecclesiastical law will direct consequences on Heather Cook.
>> We do not have the whole story, and we do know that she left the scene of
>> an accident in which someone was killed.  This is what she did.  No one can
>> say that what she did is okay or doesn't matter. What she did is definitely
>> not okay and it matters in zillions of ways.  What she did is utterly
>> wrong.   I don't think she did what she did on purpose.  I do not believe
>> she had evil intent.  For me, that is all for the law to discover and
>> judge.
>>
>> I do believe, as Elizabeth Kaeton wrote in so many words, that we have
>> taken vows to respond to her as a human being and to give compassion and I
>> would say love as we are able.  This is what we have promised in our
>> baptismal vows.  To love one another, not because of our actions, but
>> unconditionally because we are all sinful children of God.  For me, it
>> requires that I separate the person (being) from the action (doing).  When
>> I have done terrible actions, I have been thankful that other human beings
>> were there to love me (who I am), in spite of what I did.
>>
>> Ginga
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> On Sat, Jan 3, 2015 at 7:53 PM, Grace Cangialosi <gracecan at gmail.com>
>> wrote:
>>
>>> Thanks for posting this, Ginga.  It's a good reminder of our human
>>> frailty, especially in the face of sudden crisis. I like, of course, to
>>> think that I would never drive away from an accident I had caused. But I
>>> have also remembered an incident from about 12 years ago and how badly I
>>> behaved.
>>>
>>> Without going into detail, let me just say that I was stopped behind a
>>> truck as we waited for a stopped school bus in the oncoming lane.
>> Suddenly
>>> I saw in my rearview mirror a truck top the rise and come barreling down
>> on
>>> me at full speed. He clearly wasn't going to be able to stop, and I had
>>> nowhere to go.
>>> Well, I wasn't injured, but my car was totalled. But what I remember with
>>> great regret was that when the poor driver rushed up to apologise  and
>> make
>>> sure I was all right, I screamed at him, "You idiot!! Didn't you see that
>>> we were all stopped??!!
>>> His brakes had failed, and he was probably as upset as I was, but I had
>>> thought I might be killed, and my nice persona went right out the window.
>>> I can't be sure of what I would do if I were to cause a serious
>> accident...
>>> On January 3, 2015, at 6:20 PM, Ginga Wilder <gingawilder at gmail.com>
>>> wrote:
>>>
>>>> Mark Harris has written of how irrationally human beings can act in this
>>>> sort of horrific experience.
>>>> This is a note about Heather Cook the human being, who comes from a long
>>>> line of human beings related in turn to a whole host of living beings
>> who
>>>> when confronted with extraordinary threat reacts in ways not always up
>> to
>>>> frontal lobe human ethical standards.
>>>>
>> http://anglicanfuture.blogspot.com/2015/01/when-terrible-terrifying-and-awful.html?spref=fb
>>>> I feel enormous compassion for Heather Cook...I just can't help
>> myself.  I
>>>> know she is in need of pastoral compassion.  I pray she is receiving
>> that.
>>>> I hesitate to say this, because I do not want to offend those who think
>>>> otherwise.  But, no matter what she has done, and much we don't know,
>> she
>>>> is still our sister in Christ.
>>>> And, of course, the family and friends of Tom Palermo and those who
>>> witness
>>>> this god-awful accident, even we who inhabit the Pub, each and all have
>>>> need of the very same pastoral compassion.
>>>> Ginga
>>>> On Sat, Jan 3, 2015 at 5:51 PM, ME Michaud <michaudme at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>> And people do stupid and unexplained things when they're
>>>>> freaking out. Not everybody's capable of doing just the right,
>>>>> mature thing under every circumstance.
>>>>>
>>>>> We had a case where a teenager gave birth in a bathroom
>>>>> stall and walked away. The Commonwealth accused her of
>>>>> all kinds of evil stuff, but a psychiatrist, serving as an
>>>>> expert witness, explained very clearly that women who've
>>>>> just given birth aren't always capable of thinking clearly.
>>>>> Duh.
>>>>> -M
>>>>>