[Magdalen] Short-term prayers, please

[Georgia DuBose]

She said she didn't have a study Bible, so I gave her an NRSV one that
I used. She asked me to pray for her discernment and I have been doing
so.

G+

On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 4:13 PM, Grace Cangialosi <gracecan at gmail.com> wrote:
> Yes, she is, and I'm really glad. I've supplied several times at Boonesville, and they love her. She's in a spiritual directors' peer  supervision group with me.
>
> On July 29, 2015, at 6:02 PM, Georgia DuBose <gdubose at gmail.com> wrote:
>
> Dear Grace,
>
> Your well-being is very important, and I hope you receive the guidance
> of the Holy Spirit about the best approach. Please know that you are
> in my prayers, and I hope you are taking good care of yourself in a
> difficult situation. I send you all good wishes.
>
> Georgia+
>
> P.S. Donna, the lay worship leader from Boonesville, worshipped at our
> Tuesday Morning Prayer service about a month ago, visiting her MIL,
> Penny Maciolek, here. She tells me she is in discernment about a call
> to the priesthood.
>
> On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 12:41 PM, Grace Cangialosi <gracecan at gmail.com> wrote:
>> Without going into the very long, sad history, I'm asking your prayers for
>> what will probably seem like something totally insignificant.
>>
>> Periodically my son subjects me to verbal or written diatribes, sometimes
>> cutting me off from seeing his children, sometimes not.  They always seem
>> to come out of left field.  This time I had responded to an article he
>> forwarded to me, agreeing with much of it, which I thought would surprise
>> him, and thinking it might be the opening for a real conversation. Instead,
>> I got back a long, long attack, really hateful and verbally abusive. I read
>> just enough to see what was there and then deleted it. Went back later and
>> emptied it from the trash, so I wouldn't be tempted to read the whole thing
>> and spend the next three days beating myself up and wondering what I've
>> done wrong. (Which, of course, I've been doing anyway...)
>>
>>  Anyway--sorry this is so long--I carefully wrote a response, saying I was
>> sorry that he had felt the need to respond that way, that I had deleted his
>> message without reading most of it, because I didn't need that verbal
>> abuse. ( I had seen that he was heading into a place I've seen
>> before...insisting that we are all depraved and evil at heart, but my pride
>> won't let me see that, even though Scripture is clear on that. There was
>> something to the effect that I put on this show so that people will
>> think I'm a good person, etc.) I stopped reading there.
>>
>>  I told him it saddens me that that's so much of his theology, that Paul
>> really needs to be read through the lens of the Gospels and Jesus'
>> reflection of God as a God of love. And also that God created the world and
>> saw that it was good. I ended by saying that I would continue to pray that
>> he will find that God of love and know that he is loved by God.  And after
>> much consideration, I went ahead and signed it Love, Mom.
>>
>> Now I see that I have a reply from him that starts out "I hope you won't
>> delete this before reading it...,"  but I haven't opened it yet.  I'm
>> tempted to just write back and say that I haven't read it yet because I'm
>> not ready to read it, but that I  haven't deleted it yet, either.  Maybe
>> that would be the way to go?
>>
>> I also thought about forwarding it to my daughter without reading it and
>> asking her to tell me whether to read it or not, but that seems the
>> cowardly way to go.  She's aware of the situation, though I didn't share
>> the other email with her. She pretty much keeps her distance from him most
>> of the time. Her take is that he finds it easier to take his anger out on
>> me than to actually deal with the things he doesn't like about himself and
>> the choices he's made.  In my head I know that's probably true, and that's
>> what I would say to someone else in this situation, but it's hard not to
>> get hooked by this when it happens.
>>
>> Anyway, what I need is some clarity about the "right" thing to do now.
>> Delete without reading? Tell him I still have it, but am not ready to read
>> it yet?  Just grit my teeth and read it? What I feel when I contemplate
>> that last alternative is fear about what I'll find...and that is, on one
>> level, totally ridiculous, I know. Whatever is there is already there,
>> whether I read it or not.  And it couldn't possibly be any worse than
>> things I've already had to take from him. It's not the different ideas I
>> have a problem with, it's the personal attacks. And I've really worked hard
>> over the years to keep the door open to relationships with the children.
>> There have been two different times when he barred me from seeing them for
>> several months, but then it's like he kind of forgets, and they'll invite
>> me to do something.  I don't know if my daughter-in-law is aware of all of
>> this, but I've never said anything to her. She has to do exactly what he
>> says, and I don't need to add to her worries.
>>
>> Sorry...I really didn't mean to go on so long. But prayers for clarity
>> would be welcome.
>>
>> Grace
>>
>> --
>> Grace Cangialosi
>> Ruckersville, VA
>>
>> Keep Calm and Carry OM.