[Magdalen] Near the end of my rope

[Jo Craddock]

A couple thoughts follow.

I doubt she's forgotten that she cares for you, but she may well be mad 
at you. You are not ill, you don't need this help, you are going off to 
Hawaii in a week. This is the control she can exert. It's misplaced, but 
it's what she can do. That doesn't make it hurt you any less, however.

I spent two college years working part-time/full-time in a nursing home. 
I spent from 1996-2004 as secondary care giver to two aging parents, and 
2003-2005 as sole care giver to my mother. Due to their varying 
diagnoses, we caught a lot of crap; at the nursing home, I caught a lot 
of crap (figuratively and literally). I find it a distinct lack of 
calling that an evening of "bullying" would result in an aide quitting.

I wish I were nearer to help in a practical way. I know finding 
an(other) agency takes a lot of the energy you need for yourself. When 
doing the above care, people would often say to me, "Why don't you get 
some help?" Well, sh*t: if I had time to search, inquire, interview, 
investigate, I'd be napping first.

With prayers for you both, and

Peace,
Jo




On 03/08/2015 8:09 PM, James Handsfield wrote:
> Sorry to burden you all with this.  Yesterday evening Marcy bullied the evening aide, and today she quit.  I don’t blame her (the aide that is), so tonight I’m caring for Marcy on my own.  That is doable - I’ve done it before.  But it feels like she’s forgotten that she cares for me and is happy to have aides leave.  I’m about to change agencies, and maybe that will make a difference.
>
> I’m off to Hawaii for 12 days in a week.  Marcy will be at Hospice Atlanta Center during that time.  But right now I need stamina and strength.  I’m crying as I write this.