[Magdalen] puns

Sun Aug 7 05:37:26 UTC 2016

I just ran the link twice; it works fine for me. It did, however, give me
the identical tinyurl it gave you.

James W. Oppenheimer-Crawford
*“A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved,
except in memory. LLAP**”  -- *Leonard Nimoy

On Fri, Aug 5, 2016 at 5:11 PM, Christopher Hart <cervus51 at gmail.com> wrote:

> The link James sent is broken (part of it isn't underlined).
> Try this instead: http://tinyurl.com/zn2636p
>
> You may need to copy and paste it into your browser as it didn't come
> through as a link.
>
> On Fri, Aug 5, 2016 at 4:53 PM, James Oppenheimer-Crawford <
> oppenheimerjw at gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > It took me a while to figure out the search parameters to get this one to
> > come up in a format I could send to the list. In fairness, I should point
> > out that it is a bit suggestive, but I think it's kind of cute.
> >
> > I think it's fair to assume that nobody on this list will believe this is
> > for real, but just in case:
> >
> > The following is a parody, a spoof.  Do not engage.  Do not forward.
> Unless
> > you want to give your friends a laughing fit. Not recommended for RCC
> nuns,
> > or people who think they are RCC nuns. Episcopalian nuns will probably
> love
> > it.
> >
> > http://www.huffingtonpost.com/nora-ephron/fwd-do-not-break-
> > the-chai_b_40163.html
> >
> > James W. Oppenheimer-Crawford
> > *“A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved,
> > except in memory. LLAP**”  -- *Leonard Nimoy
> >
> > On Fri, Aug 5, 2016 at 3:28 PM, Lynn Ronkainen <houstonklr at gmail.com>
> > wrote:
> >
> > > A favorite of mine!!
> > > Lynn
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > www.ichthysdesigns.com
> > >
> > > When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I
> would
> > > not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything
> > you
> > > gave me'. attributed to Erma Bombeck
> > >
> > >
> > > On Aug 5, 2016, at 1:33 PM, James Oppenheimer-Crawford <
> > > oppenheimerjw at gmail.com> wrote:
> > >
> > > not a pun, but I kinda like it.....
> > >
> > >
> > > "You may touch the dust, but please do not write in it."
> > >
> > > James W. Oppenheimer-Crawford
> > > *“A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not
> preserved,
> > > except in memory. LLAP**”  -- *Leonard Nimoy
> > >
> > > > On Thu, Aug 4, 2016 at 8:14 AM, Jon Egger <revegger at gmail.com>
> wrote:
> > > >
> > > > 1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir
> Cumference.
> > >  He
> > > > acquired his size from too much pi.
> > > >
> > > > 2. I thought I observed an eye doctor on an Alaskan island.  Turned
> out
> > > to
> > > > be an optical Aleutian.
> > > >
> > > > 3. She was only a lowly bootlegger, but he loved her still.
> > > >
> > > > 4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class.  The
> > reason:
> > > > it was a weapon of math disruption.
> > > >
> > > > 5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be
> stationery.
> > > >
> > > > 6. A dog gave birth to puppies beside a road and was cited for
> > littering.
> > > >
> > > > 7. A grenade thrown into a French kitchen would result in Linoleum
> > > > Blownapart.
> > > >
> > > > 8. Two silk worms were in a race.  They ended up in a tie.
> > > >
> > > > 9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.  The police are
> > looking
> > > > into it.
> > > >
> > > > 10. Time flies like an arrow.  Fruit flies like bananas.
> > > >
> > > > 11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
> > > >
> > > > 12. Two hats were on a hat rack.   One said to the other: "You stay
> > here.
> > > > I'll go on a head."
> > > >
> > > > 13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.  Then it hit me.
> > > >
> > > > 14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said:  "Keep off the
> > > Grass".
> > > >
> > > > 15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small
> > medium
> > > at
> > > > large.
> > > >
> > > > 16. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
> > > seasoned
> > > > veteran.
> > > >
> > > > 17. A backward poet writes inverse.
> > > >
> > > > 18. In a democracy, it's your vote that counts.  In feudalism, it's
> > your
> > > > count that votes.
> > > >
> > > > 19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got their first taste of
> > > > religion.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > 20. If you jumped off a bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine.
> > > >
> > > > 21. A vulture carrying two dead raccoons boarded an airplane.   The
> > > > stewardess told him, "I'm sorry, sir! Only one carrion allowed per
> > > > passenger."
> > > >
> > > > 22. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in
> > the
> > > > craft.  Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't
> have
> > > your
> > > > kayak and heat it too.
> > > >
> > > > 23. Two hydrogen atoms meet.  One says, "I've lost my electron".  The
> > > other
> > > > says  "Are you sure?"  The first replied, "Yes, I'm positive."
> > > >
> > > > 24. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a
> root
> > > > canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.
> > > >
> > > > 25. And at last ...There was the person who sent ten puns to their
> > > friends
> > > > with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.
> No
> > > pun
> > > > in ten did.
> > > >
> > > > --
> > > > If no one has told you that they love you today,
> > > > let me be the first.
> > > > brud
> > > >
> > >
> >
>
>
>
> --
>
> Christopher Hart
>
> List Mail Address: cervus51 at gmail.com
> Personal Mail: cervus at veritasliberat.net
> Twitter: @cervus51
>