[Magdalen] "California woman holds party before killing herself"

[Grace Cangialosi]

There's a lot of misconception about the disposition of ashes, which a
funeral director straightened out for me a number of years ago. I was
talking about wanting my ashes spread on one of the overlooks in Shenandoah
National Park above my house.  I said someone had told me that was against
the law. The director said that was not true--you can literally spread
ashes anywhere--as long as it's just the ashes and you're not burying an
urn or other container.  That, of course, makes perfect sense. As Jim said,
who would know anyway?

On Sun, Aug 14, 2016 at 4:42 PM, Clarissa Canning <canplum at gmail.com> wrote:

> wow so neat for this lady. I would love my ashes to be put in " the secret
> garden " at our summer home." not sure it's allowed.  It not really a
> garden Not used for anything. It was the passage to the original barn. sits
> much Lower than the road & few parking spaces we have.  It does  contain an
> old large grave stone of a great great grandmother.
>
>
>
> On Aug 12, 2016 11:21 AM, "Jay Weigel" <jay.weigel at gmail.com> wrote:
>
> That's pretty cool, Grace. I've always said I'd rather have a party than a
> funeral. I don't have that many friends around here though. And I think I
> still want to be cremated and scattered, part of me in the Atlantic Ocean,
> part here in the Shenandoah Valley that I've come to love so much, and
> maybe a little back in Tennessee that I still love and miss.
>
> On Thu, Aug 11, 2016 at 8:47 PM, Grace Cangialosi <gracecan at gmail.com>
> wrote:
>
> > I have a dear 91-year-old friend in Southwest Virginia who had a "funeral
> > party" for herself a year or so ago. I wasn't there, but she recently
> told
> > me about it. She's not sick, just old and a bit frail, and still
> brilliant.
> > She wanted to be able to enjoy the party while she's still alive, so she
> > had friends and lots of her favorite music and wine. One of the featured
> > activities was the decorating of her wooden coffin, which now sits on her
> > screened-in porch with some plants and a couple of small sculptures on
> it.
> > It's pine and very simple with wooden pole handles running the length of
> > each side. And it is a thing of beauty! Her friends painted symbols of
> her
> > life and career, from the logo of the Highlander Center in TN to her
> > beloved red truck to the old barn on her farm. And they wrote all over
> it,
> > like you'd do in a high school yearbook. I told her it's entirely too
> > pretty to put in the ground! But that's what will happen. And her
> > instructions are clear: when the time comes, she is to be laid in that
> > coffin by her friends, loaded on to the back of her truck and taken to
> the
> > small private cemetery on the farm where she will be buried. Period.
> > You'd have to know her to really appreciate how typical this is for her.
> > No suicide, though, just nature taking its course.
> >
> > > On Aug 11, 2016, at 5:50 PM, Jay Weigel <jay.weigel at gmail.com> wrote:
> > >
> > > Sounds like as good a way as any to go, as long as you know you're
> going
> > > anyway.
> > >
> > > On Thu, Aug 11, 2016 at 4:16 PM, M J _Mike_ Logsdon <mjl at ix.netcom.com
> >
> > > wrote:
> > >
> > >> [I think "killing herself" is a bit crass, but at least they corrected
> > it
> > >> in the final sentence.]
> > >>
> > >> California woman holds party before killing herself
> > >> By JULIE WATSON
> > >> From Associated Press
> > >> August 11, 2016 2:53 PM EST
> > >>
> > >> SAN DIEGO (AP) — A California woman with ALS, or Lou Gehrig's disease,
> > >> held a two-day party for her friends and relatives to say goodbye
> before
> > >> taking her life with a dose of prescribed drugs.
> > >>
> > >> Betsy Davis, 41, became one of the first Californians to make use a
> new
> > >> state law allowing doctor-assisted suicide. Four other states have
> such
> > >> laws, with Oregon the first in 1997.
> > >>
> > >> Davis shared her plans with her guests, giving them a detailed
> schedule
> > >> for the weekend that included the hour she planned to slip into a
> coma.
> > >>
> > >> There were cocktails. There was pizza from her favorite local joint.
> > There
> > >> was a screening of one of her favorite movies. And then her friends
> said
> > >> their goodbyes and left.
> > >>
> > >> Davis was wheeled out to a canopy bed on a hillside and took her own
> > life.
> > >>
> >
>



-- 
Grace Cangialosi
Ruckersville, VA

*“Silence in the face of evil is itself evil. God will not hold us
guiltless. Not to speak is to speak. Not to act is to act.” - Dietrich
Bonhoeffer*