[Magdalen] "California woman holds party before killing herself"

[Lynn Ronkainen]

A local crematorium has been running a helpful ad in the vicinity of the 
obits lately - "helpful tips", one of which was take the ashes out of the 
plastic bag and then put them back into the urn or container *before* having 
a burial at sea.... (otherwise they float : (

Lynn

website: www.ichthysdesigns.com

When I stand before God at the end of my life I would hope that I have not a 
single bit of talent left and could say, "I used everything You gave me." 
attributed to Erma Bombeck
 "Either Freedom for all or stop talking about Freedom at all" from a talk 
by Richard Rohr

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From: "Grace Cangialosi" <gracecan at gmail.com>
Sent: Sunday, August 14, 2016 4:40 PM
To: "magdalen" <magdalen at herberthouse.org>
Subject: Re: [Magdalen] "California woman holds party before killing 
herself"

> There's a lot of misconception about the disposition of ashes, which a
> funeral director straightened out for me a number of years ago. I was
> talking about wanting my ashes spread on one of the overlooks in 
> Shenandoah
> National Park above my house.  I said someone had told me that was against
> the law. The director said that was not true--you can literally spread
> ashes anywhere--as long as it's just the ashes and you're not burying an
> urn or other container.  That, of course, makes perfect sense. As Jim 
> said,
> who would know anyway?
>
> On Sun, Aug 14, 2016 at 4:42 PM, Clarissa Canning <canplum at gmail.com> 
> wrote:
>
>> wow so neat for this lady. I would love my ashes to be put in " the 
>> secret
>> garden " at our summer home." not sure it's allowed.  It not really a
>> garden Not used for anything. It was the passage to the original barn. 
>> sits
>> much Lower than the road & few parking spaces we have.  It does  contain 
>> an
>> old large grave stone of a great great grandmother.
>>
>>
>>
>> On Aug 12, 2016 11:21 AM, "Jay Weigel" <jay.weigel at gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>> That's pretty cool, Grace. I've always said I'd rather have a party than 
>> a
>> funeral. I don't have that many friends around here though. And I think I
>> still want to be cremated and scattered, part of me in the Atlantic 
>> Ocean,
>> part here in the Shenandoah Valley that I've come to love so much, and
>> maybe a little back in Tennessee that I still love and miss.
>>
>> On Thu, Aug 11, 2016 at 8:47 PM, Grace Cangialosi <gracecan at gmail.com>
>> wrote:
>>
>> > I have a dear 91-year-old friend in Southwest Virginia who had a 
>> > "funeral
>> > party" for herself a year or so ago. I wasn't there, but she recently
>> told
>> > me about it. She's not sick, just old and a bit frail, and still
>> brilliant.
>> > She wanted to be able to enjoy the party while she's still alive, so 
>> > she
>> > had friends and lots of her favorite music and wine. One of the 
>> > featured
>> > activities was the decorating of her wooden coffin, which now sits on 
>> > her
>> > screened-in porch with some plants and a couple of small sculptures on
>> it.
>> > It's pine and very simple with wooden pole handles running the length 
>> > of
>> > each side. And it is a thing of beauty! Her friends painted symbols of
>> her
>> > life and career, from the logo of the Highlander Center in TN to her
>> > beloved red truck to the old barn on her farm. And they wrote all over
>> it,
>> > like you'd do in a high school yearbook. I told her it's entirely too
>> > pretty to put in the ground! But that's what will happen. And her
>> > instructions are clear: when the time comes, she is to be laid in that
>> > coffin by her friends, loaded on to the back of her truck and taken to
>> the
>> > small private cemetery on the farm where she will be buried. Period.
>> > You'd have to know her to really appreciate how typical this is for 
>> > her.
>> > No suicide, though, just nature taking its course.
>> >
>> > > On Aug 11, 2016, at 5:50 PM, Jay Weigel <jay.weigel at gmail.com> wrote:
>> > >
>> > > Sounds like as good a way as any to go, as long as you know you're
>> going
>> > > anyway.
>> > >
>> > > On Thu, Aug 11, 2016 at 4:16 PM, M J _Mike_ Logsdon 
>> > > <mjl at ix.netcom.com
>> >
>> > > wrote:
>> > >
>> > >> [I think "killing herself" is a bit crass, but at least they 
>> > >> corrected
>> > it
>> > >> in the final sentence.]
>> > >>
>> > >> California woman holds party before killing herself
>> > >> By JULIE WATSON
>> > >> From Associated Press
>> > >> August 11, 2016 2:53 PM EST
>> > >>
>> > >> SAN DIEGO (AP) — A California woman with ALS, or Lou Gehrig's 
>> > >> disease,
>> > >> held a two-day party for her friends and relatives to say goodbye
>> before
>> > >> taking her life with a dose of prescribed drugs.
>> > >>
>> > >> Betsy Davis, 41, became one of the first Californians to make use a
>> new
>> > >> state law allowing doctor-assisted suicide. Four other states have
>> such
>> > >> laws, with Oregon the first in 1997.
>> > >>
>> > >> Davis shared her plans with her guests, giving them a detailed
>> schedule
>> > >> for the weekend that included the hour she planned to slip into a
>> coma.
>> > >>
>> > >> There were cocktails. There was pizza from her favorite local joint.
>> > There
>> > >> was a screening of one of her favorite movies. And then her friends
>> said
>> > >> their goodbyes and left.
>> > >>
>> > >> Davis was wheeled out to a canopy bed on a hillside and took her own
>> > life.
>> > >>
>> >
>>
>
>
>
> -- 
> Grace Cangialosi
> Ruckersville, VA
>
> *“Silence in the face of evil is itself evil. God will not hold us
> guiltless. Not to speak is to speak. Not to act is to act.” - Dietrich
> Bonhoeffer*