[Magdalen] A bit of a problem.. any suggestions ??

[Grace Cangialosi]

Well, others may disagree with me, but my advice is not to insert yourself into this situation at this point, but let the family work it out with the priest. Do not offer; that can only backfire.

It’s not clear from your post whether the funeral is imminent, but at this point, it isn’t your problem. If someone in the family approaches you, tell them you’ll be glad to do it, but only with the priest’s approval—and then make sure he has actually given it.

I have occasionally run into this with former parishioners—as have most clergy—when they want me to come back and do a funeral.  I always tell them I’d be happy to assist, but it’s up to the current rector/vicar.  That precludes someone doing an end run.

But if you leave this up to the family and the priest to work out, you’ll have a clear conscience, and the family can’t fault you. (The other organist may be a different issue...)

Good luck!
Grace

> On Apr 22, 2018, at 2:08 PM, Sheila Ketler <debbiedimond52 at gmail.com> wrote:
> 
> Hello everyone
> As most of you may know or may not know I sub as an organist at a Catholic
> parish. My future daughter in law's grandmother was very devout Catholic
> and Delores attended this parish faithfully. Now Delores dislikes the
> organist in charge over there and she advised her family (but not the
> priest) that she did not want that other woman playing the organ and she
> told them she wanted me to do it...
> The problem is she did not tell the priest this and if the family do not
> make her wishes known then that other woman will do it...
> Not sure how to handle this ....This only happens with me in my life why is
> there always such a problem? and I would have offered but thought they
> would turn me down flat...!!
> 
> Any advice welcomed...
> 
> Sheila