[Magdalen] Reunion blues

[Ginga Wilder]

So, so true, Jay!  John and I have only missed one of our every 5 year
reunions since 1965.  The adolescent peer group stuff has dissolved and we
are simple a group of people who shared (mostly) 12 years of your childhood
and youth together.  We are glad to see each other again.  I do not think
anyone is planning a 55th reunion - we have lost a good number of
classmates over the years.  Summerville High School Class of '65 students
have tended to stay local to raise our families.  This means that we go to
funerals of classmates and also their parents.  Small southern
town....maybe 5-6000 citizens when we graduated - now nearing 125,000.
Whew!

Ginga

On Sat, Sep 8, 2018 at 9:21 AM Jay Weigel <jay.weigel at gmail.com> wrote:

> I went to my 40th and it was a revelation! I talked to people I had barely
> noticed in high school, (or who had barely noticed me), hugged and was
> hugged by people I had not exactly been friends with then, but became
> friends with at the reunion, and learned a great deal. All the barriers
> that used to be are down by 40 years on. I wish I had gone to the 50th. If
> there's a 55th I'm going. I may never see those people again. Some I
> probably saw for the last time at the 40th: some; sadly, I know I did, as
> they have passed since then.
>
> On Fri, Sep 7, 2018 at 8:07 PM Lesley de Voil <lesleymdv at gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > Agreeing wholeheartedly with those who would say, “If you don’t go, there
> > may be never another opportunity for closure in an unresolved breakdown
> in
> > relationship.” I went to the funeral of the wife of a colleague, and met
> up
> > with another ex-colleague whom I had resented for years. Suffice it to
> say,
> > we have both changed (? matured) and have become completely reconciled
> > since then. If I had not gone to the funeral, even out of a sense of
> duty,
> > this reconciliation may never have happened.
> >
> > Regards
> > Lesley de Voil
> >
> > On Sat, 8 Sep 2018 at 07:38, Scott Knitter <scottknitter at gmail.com>
> wrote:
> >
> > > What a marvelous reconciliation out of a moment of self-sharing and
> > > forgiveness, 40 years on, Simon!
> > >
> > > I was just thinking, though, how Facebook may have changed class
> reunions
> > > somewhat: classmate Mike Wilkins could say he's been working as a
> > producer
> > > at WBUR in Boston for The World, a joint production of WBUR and the BBC
> > > World Service. And we'd all say, "Yep, we know from Facebook...how
> cool!
> > > What celebrities have you met lately, and what is Marco Wurman like?"
> > Mary
> > > Jane Mudd could tell tales of being a spokeswoman for the Red Cross in
> > > Houston during the horrible floods, and having to take harsh criticism
> > for
> > > perceived inadequacies in the shelters. "I know...how terrible; the
> > > pictures were unbelievable." And I guess I can keep my own story brief
> > and
> > > avoid the glazed-over look when I explain what I do as a proposal
> manager
> > > for an end-to-end digital technology provider. "For details, see my
> > > LinkedIn page." :)
> > >
> > > So fewer amazing tales of what-I'm-doing-now and more just spontaneous
> > time
> > > with people you've kept up with on all the newsy stuff. But I'm sure
> some
> > > amazement at seeing folks who don't show up on Facebook and whom one
> > hasn't
> > > thought about in years.
> > >
> > > On Fri, Sep 7, 2018 at 3:29 PM Simon Kershaw <simon at kershaw.org.uk>
> > wrote:
> > >
> > > > I went to my 40th reunion last year.
> > > >
> > > > Soon afterwards I wrote this:
> > > >
> > > > 'And secondly there was meeting the person who had been the class
> > bully,
> > > > and I one of his victims. "I was in two minds whether to come," he
> > said,
> > > > "and especially what I would say to you." "We didn't always get on,
> did
> > > > we?" I replied, putting my arm round his shoulder. "I was horrible,"
> he
> > > > said, "not a nice person at all. I was bullied at home and I behaved
> > the
> > > > same at school." I think it was a moment of closure for both of us,
> 40
> > > > years on.'
> > https://www.facebook.com/kershaw.simon/posts/1423775084383838
> > > >
> > > > and then added this in a private email:
> > > >
> > > > 'The background on Saturday was that the two of us had bumped into
> each
> > > > other very early on in the afternoon, and I had asked what he had
> been
> > > > doing and we chatted about our families and careers. Then later we
> > found
> > > > ourselves together again, and that's when the reported conversation
> > took
> > > > place, but after he had said that he didn't know how or what he would
> > > > say to me he added "but you were brilliant, you just talked to me",
> and
> > > > it was at that moment that it occurred to me that I had it completely
> > in
> > > > my power to show that he was forgiven (I explicitly use religious
> > > > language here). My gesture and words were completely spontaneous but
> > > > intended to convey that. I presume they did so because he then opened
> > up
> > > > about his background. That was not known to me at the time (and
> doesn't
> > > > absolve him of responsibility for what he did), but I really sensed
> > > > there was closure for him in this. And later, as I wrote the Facebook
> > > > post, I realized that in a sense there was also closure for me.
> > > > I didn't expect any of that to happen on Saturday.
> > > > So ... okay, I'm happy for this to be shared with the Headmaster if
> you
> > > > wish to do so. But any further sharing I'd want to think about a bit
> > > more.'
> > > >
> > > > You never know what's going to happen, or what impact it might have,
> do
> > > > you?
> > > >
> > > > simon
> > > >
> > > > On 07/09/2018 21.13, Rick Mashburn wrote:
> > > > > I've never been to any of my reunions. I have absolutely no
> regrets.
> > I
> > > > see
> > > > > the people I want to see from time to time and have no interest in
> > the
> > > > > rest.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > --
> > > > Simon Kershaw
> > > > simon at kershaw.org.uk
> > > > Saint Ives, Cambridgeshire
> > > >
> > >
> > >
> > > --
> > > Scott R. Knitter
> > > Edgewater, Chicago, Illinois USA
> > >
> > --
> > Sent from MetroMail
> >
>