[Magdalen] More with Marcy

[Ginga Wilder]

Praying often for Marcy and you, Jim.

Ginga

On Sun, Sep 6, 2015 at 10:00 AM, Judy Fleener <fleenerj at gmail.com> wrote:

> All I have to offer is prayer.
> Judy
>
> On Sun, Sep 6, 2015 at 2:27 AM, Sally Davies <sally.davies at gmail.com>
> wrote:
>
> > Prayers as always, Jim. You and Marcy are often in my thoughts.
> >
> > As to not being able to do anything about the dementia, it might still be
> > worth contacting the ALS multidisciplinary clinic if you are associated
> > with one. There is new knowledge and research on the overlap between ALS
> > and Fronto-Temporal dementia (differrent to Alzheimer's in several
> > important ways), and expert advice is always of value even if only to
> give
> > you some ideas for new ways to think about/cope with what's going on with
> > Marcy and what she might be experiencing.
> >
> > Unless she's had a stroke along the way (which might not be impossible?)I
> > would guess that this latest 'reality interface malfunction' is part of a
> > more general loss of insight as neural circuits break down, sometimes
> > reconnecting weirdly and other times going silent.
> >
> > And maybe loss of insight, for the person concerned, is not such a
> terrible
> > thing. If it were me, I would rather be thinking "I can help Jim with the
> > cooking" than "I will never cook again".
> >
> > Jo, thanks for sharing that snippet of memory from the weary days of
> > caregiving with your Mom. I hadn't thought about the "bittersweet"
> moments,
> > but will file that away, if I may, as something to enquire about when
> > people are strugging with caegiving or are going through bereavement.
> >
> > I've seen many reactions to the dementia of a loved one, from total
> > distancing to 100% involvement. The latter takes immense strength and
> > determination but I cannot believe that the people who take that "road
> less
> > travelled" are ever likely to regret it. My beloved friend Jenny in the
> UK
> > was nearly wiped out by her commitment to herr Mom (blind and suffering
> > dementia) but she saw it through and the "peace dividend" in her life now
> > is a joy to behold. Like you, Jenny tried to take breaks when she could
> and
> > it made a big difference, keeping exhaustion from running all of her
> plans
> > and strategies and emotions.
> >
> > Sally
> >
> > On Sunday, September 6, 2015, Jo Craddock <jocraddock at gmail.com
> > <javascript:_e(%7B%7D,'cvml','jocraddock at gmail.com');>> wrote:
> >
> > > This behavior so reminds me of some exhibited by my mother as her
> cancer
> > > metastasized. I found if I could be kindly honest, rather than brutally
> > > honest, it often helped both of us deal with each particular situation.
> > > "Wouldn't that be nice? I wish you could do that, too." Of course, I
> was
> > > not always up to that, nor was she always open to it. Take a nap,
> > yourself,
> > > while she naps, if at all possible.
> > >
> > > Some of those times are now etched in our household collective memory
> as
> > > sweet incidents of the spirit being willing, but the flesh weak. "Yes,
> > > mother; why don't you cook tonight?" and talking through it with her
> as I
> > > prepared dinner, has become a euphemism for someone suggesting a
> project
> > > that another has to complete. And, we can smile with the remembrance.
> > >
> > > With prayer for
> > >
> > > Peace,
> > > Jo
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > On 09/05/2015 8:28 PM, James Handsfield wrote:
> > >
> > >> Yes, I have.  The problem is that there really is nothing to gain by a
> > >> specific diagnosis of dementia as it won’t change the course of
> Marcy’s
> > >> disease or the way we deal with it.
> > >>
> > >> This is known as Frustration.
> > >>
> > >>
> > >
> >
>
>
>
> --
> Judy Fleener, ObJN
> Western Michigan
>