[Magdalen] New prayer request, and apology.

[Judy Fleener]

Mike, you are in my prayers.  I will be glad to hold up part of that golden
hammock.

On Fri, Jan 29, 2016 at 11:34 AM, Sally Davies <sally.davies at gmail.com>
wrote:

> What Molly said...we live in a health obsessed world and although that's a
> good thing in many ways, it really does invite people to feel responsible
> when shit happens, as it always has.
>
> Prayers for peace, for healing, for freedom from pain and discomfort and
> also from fear. We've been through a couple of cancer scares lately as you
> know, and I can vouch for the gentle swinging of the Golden Hammock. It's
> so real...at times I would forget about everything, including the fear and
> the hammock, and then suddenly realise how much time had passed without any
> anxiety.
>
> I'd be surprised and then I'd remember, oh yes, I'm in the hammock. That's
> why.
>
> Sally D
>
> On Friday, 29 January 2016, Molly Wolf <lupa at kos.net> wrote:
>
> > Prayers.
> >
> > Breathe deeply.  You're in the golden hammock.
> >
> > Molly
> >
> > The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no
> > other way. -- Mark Twain
> >
> > > On Jan 28, 2016, at 11:33 PM, M J _Mike_ Logsdon <mjl at ix.netcom.com
> > <javascript:;>> wrote:
> > >
> > > I know not to apologise, but I can't help it.  I got a call from
> > Stanford dermatology this afternoon telling me Dr Kim, Stanford lymphoma
> > honcho (honcha? she's a she) needs a bigger, meatier biopsy from my feet.
> > Such that it will involve the dermatology surgery people and not just in
> > the exam room "hold still, this'll be over soon" sort of thing I already
> > hardly could take.  I was told they will numb me more, but I'll "still
> feel
> > the pressure".  (I hate the word "pressure", because when the brain knows
> > what the "pressure" means, it ain't pressure anymore; it's carnage.)  I
> > plan on telling them soon when they call back to confirm what day
> (another
> > issue entirely; I live 1.5 hours away, and work), that I REQUIRE TO BE
> > KNOCKED OUT, so bring along a knock-er-out-er.  They will no doubt balk,
> > but I will point out that many tooth extractions in the world (one of
> mine
> > included) involve being knocked out, wake up later, and go home no sweat.
> > I COULD HARDLY tolerate what happened to me two weeks ago.  Even if I
> have
> > to pay out of my own goddamned pocket, I will.  KNOCKED OUT.  I wonder
> what
> > sort of response I'll get.
> > >
> > > The goal is still to determine if I have one, or two, types of
> lymphoma,
> > or only one and still only vasculitis down below.  And in the meantime I
> > noted today that I needed to truly clean my wounds and apply antibiotic
> > ointment, as things were starting to smell again.  Please, God, let me
> > maintain till Stanford next week.
> > >
> > > And, on top of all that, I learn today that, not that I'll be losing my
> > job, but that because I'm literally half of a very important unit, only
> my
> > boss is there most of the time, I'll most likely be re-assigned within
> the
> > Agency.  Not a problem, but my sense of "entitlement" to how well I do my
> > job, is, as far as I'm concerned, already undermined by the simple fact
> > that I can't be there every day.  And being sick on top of all that.  I'm
> > meeting with my division chief tomorrow morning to discuss short-term
> > disability, as I really don't see myself in the coming weeks being of
> much
> > use to the Agency.  It's just new territory for me, so I'm scared.  But
> my
> > division chief, and another friend who knows this issue rather well, will
> > help me through.  My issue, and I said this to my supervisor twice today,
> > is "I'm a single-income household [-- she a two-income household, and
> > higher-paid than me, in both instances --], so this isn't a decision I
> can
> > take lightly."
> > >
> > > I'm so so so fucking sad and self-loathing right now, for having not
> > taken care of myself to avoid this.  If someone was to come up to me and
> > point a gun at my head, I really think I'd say "Shoot."
> >
>



-- 
Judy Fleener, ObJN
Western Michigan